Too Little, Too Late: Modern P&P and Persuasion
by BHGV18
Summary: Lizzie and Will meet while doing Research at college. A year later Lizzie gets engaged to the man of her dreams! But when she closes her eyes, all she can picture is Darcy. Is Darcy too late to get her back? Are there second chances? AU
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note**: This is a new modern twist on our beloved story. It is going to be intertwining Persuasion and Pride & Prejudice, while including some twists and turns of my own. I hope you join me for the ride and that you enjoy the story!

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><p>"<strong>Too Little, Too Late"<strong>

**Ch. 1: The News**:

"Lizzie—will you marry me?" said David Collins, bending down on one knee. The sea breeze was brushing against her face. She softly brushed some of her hair back with her hand and stood in utter disbelief.

"I…" muttered Lizzie, swallowing hard. The moment was perfect. She had always imagined getting engaged by the pier nearby her house. There was something about the water that had always attracted her and a proposal on the beach was her ultimate dream. The timing was perfect. He was the ultimate catch. A Doctor, in his Residency, great family, wealthy, sweet, and most importantly, he absolutely adored her. But at that moment, when the scenario was perfect, only one thought came to her mind: _Darcy_.

"I…" she continued, not knowing what to say. "I'm so surprised!" she muttered, raising her hand to her lips.

"A _happy_ surprise?" asked David Collins hesitantly, standing up and taking a step towards her.

"A very happy surprise" she answered, biting her lip nervously. He reached for her hands and held them closely. The sun was setting behind them—creating a picture-perfect-moment.

"Is that a yes then…?" probed David Collins, unsure of Lizzie's response.

"Yes!" she said finally, with a big smile. "Yes!" she said again, wrapping her arms around his neck. He lifted her up and twirled her around, planting kisses on her neck.

"I'm so happy Lizzie" he whispered. She shut her eyes and all she could see what _his_ face. With a tear falling from her eye, she whispered back, "me too".

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><p>"Let me see the ring!" said Mrs. Bennet, grabbing her daughter's hand. "This is beautiful David! Wow!" she said, melting over the details on the ring. David's eyes were focused on Lizzie. He was effusively happy. A wide smile escaped his lips every so often, always in the direction of Lizzie.<p>

"Congratulations" said Mr. Bennet, shaking David's hand. "Welcome to the family" he said earnestly, while patting him on the back. Dr. and Mrs. Collin were also there, toasting to their son's engagement. They had always hoped that he would marry someone from their social and economic status but after meeting Lizzie, they realized why their son had fallen in love with her. She was truly golden and no money could ever compare with natural grace and intelligence. All material things were ephemeral, while her intrinsic worth was everlasting.

"Thank you!" said Lizzie, hugging her future in-laws warmly. They looked at her fondly as they handed her a bracelet, which had belonged to Mrs. Collins's mother.

"My mother would be honored to have you wear this family heirloom. Not only is David fortunate, but we are so lucky to have you as part of the family" said Mrs. Collins, squeezing Lizzie's hand lightly.

"Thank you" she whispered, looking fondly at them and then at David. Lydia walked into the room with a bottle of champagne and a few cups dangling in her hands.

"Who wants to celebrate?" she asked, waving the glasses around. Everyone got some champagne and made a toast for the future Dr. and Mrs. Collins.

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><p>"Will!" called Mrs. Darcy through the intercom.<p>

"Yes mom?" asked Will, coming down the stairs. His parents were holding a letter in their hands, eagerly waiting for him to open it. Will's eyes almost bolted as he reached for the letter nervously.

"_Dear Mr. William Darcy,_

_We are honored to offer you a spot in Harvard Medical School for the Fall of 2012…._"

"Oh my…" said William, covering his mouth with his hand. His parents shrieked and hugged him tightly. Mrs. Darcy hugged her son and kissed him on the cheek—tears pouring out of her eyes.

"I need to call Lizzie" whispered William, as he reached for his Blackberry.

"Who?" asked his mom, intrigued at the mention of a girl's name.

"The girl he did "research" with last year" peeped in Georgiana, as she walked into the kitchen.

"While you were dating Caroline?" asked Mrs. Darcy, surprised that her son had never mentioned her before.

"Yeah…I…we became good friends" muttered William, "I'll be right back". He dialed her number, eagerly waiting for her to answer the phone.

"Hello?" said Lizzie.

"I have the best of news" Will answered eagerly. "I got in!"

"Oh my, _wow_! Great news, congratulations!" said Lizzie, genuinely excited for him. "You deserve this, I'm honestly so proud and happy for you!"

"Thank you! I just found out, but I had to call you" he said, making Lizzie blush. She raised her hand to her cheek and the shine from her ring went in her eye.

"I have to go, I'm sorry" said Lizzie, staring at ring.

"What's all the noise? Where are you?"

"My engagement party. David proposed today…" answered Lizzie.

"Oh" said Darcy curtly, "Congratulations! I guess it's a lucky day" he added in a low voice.

"Yeah, we'll be in touch" she said, hanging up the phone.

"Bye" whispered Darcy, not believing what he had just heard.

"_Yo_, Will, mom and dad want to know if you want to go that fancy shmancy restaurant to celebrate" said Georgiana, popping her face in the living room. "Are you _okay_?" she asked, noticing his long face.

"Yeah, I am great" said William in a monotone. "I guess we can go out"

"What did Lizzie say?" said Georgiana, sitting on the couch. William followed her and sank his shoulders in the comfortable seats.

"She just got engaged" said Will, in complete disbelief. _To someone other than me_, he thought to himself.

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><p>"Who was that?" asked David, touching her shoulder softly. "Your friends found out already?" he asked in disbelief.<p>

"No, a friend called to share some good news" whispered Lizzie.

"You okay?" said David, raising her chin with his fingers. He lightly kissed her lips, cupping her face with his hands.

"I am now" said Lizzie, smiling widely after his kiss.

"Good" said David, reaching for her hand. "Ready to go back to the cacophony we call family?"

"Yeah" whispered Lizzie, forcing another smile.

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><p><strong>Author's Note<strong>:I love reviews, if you like the story/idea, let me know with a simple review ;)


	2. Chapter 2

**Ch 2: The Tables Are Turned:**

Lizzie was lying on her bed, clutching her pillow next to her cheek. Tears were precipitating from her chocolate brown eyes, soaking the pillow. A soft knock on the door brought her back to reality.

"Lizzie?" asked Jane in a soft voice, as she opened the door slightly."Are you okay?" she asked, noticing Lizzie crying on her bed.

"Will called" mumbled Lizzie, without even looking up. This was all the explanation she needed to give. Jane sat on the foot of the bed, placing her hand softly on Lizzie's back.

"Oh Lizzie" whispered Jane, rubbing her back gently. Lizzie got up and with blotchy eyes, turned to face Jane.

"What? Did he think I was just going to wait for him? I waited for him for a year! First, he was going out with Caroline, then he was studying for his MCATS, then he was applying to Med School. Okay, so he was busy. So I dated other people! I wasn't going to sit playing with my thumbs while he preciously took his time. Now that I met someone that adores me and is perfect in every way—he obviously pops back into my mind and into my life! He called me to tell me he got into Harvard Med School. Why are you freaking calling me?" Lizzie took a deep breath. All the anger she had been building up for the past year was finally being released. "After I got past his imperiousness and misunderstood arrogance, I fell for him Jane. You know that I never felt for anyone what I felt for him. But I couldn't just wait for him to realize that I was there waiting for him" Lizzie wiped off her tears and continued, "I'm marrying David. He is amazing, everything I have ever wanted and most importantly, he treats me like a princess…".

Jane nodded and gave Lizzie a faint smile, attempting to support her decision. She realized that this tirade was just a rant—she needed to cool off some steam. Jane did not know what to think. David was perfect. Of _that,_ there was no doubt. But was the right one for Lizzie?

As if on cue, Lizzie's phone rang. She read: "William Darcy".

"Speaking of the freaking devil" she murmured, before she picked it up. "Hey Will, what's up?"

"Hey Lizzie" answered a composed Will. It had taken him a few hours to gain back his equanimity. "When are you getting back to NY?" he continued.

"Ahh, I'm not sure, I start school in a few weeks but _David_ needs to get back, he is in the middle of his second year of Residency so I might go back with him or I might start some _wedding_ planning" she answered, hoping the mention of the wedding and David would send daggers in his heart. She had suffered every time she had heard of Caroline and every moment her heart longed for him.

"Right…the wedding" murmured Will, "Is it that soon?"

"It will probably be in the summer, before I go to grad school, so in a few months…"

"Did you get in anywhere yet?" asked Will, knowing full well that if she had, he would have already heard about it.

"No, I'm still waiting to hear. But regardless, I have to stay in NY. That's where David is, he need to finish his last year of Residency" answered Lizzie.

"What about Harvard? That has been your dream" said Will.

"A girl has many dreams…and not all of them always get fulfilled" she answered, letting out a heavy sigh. Her mind could not help but think of him as she said those words.

"I think that happens to men _and _women Lizzie…we all have dreams that do not come to fruition"

"Well sometimes we let them slip away" suggested Lizzie, hoping he would understand her double meaning. He certainly did.

"But it is never too late to get them back, right?" he asked hopefully.

"I don't know" mumbled Lizzie, holding back a tear. She truly did not know.

"I, uh, well when you get back, I want to talk to you and say uh hello" said Darcy, fumbling through his words.

"Sure, I'll text you when I have a better idea of when I'll be there"

"And Lizzie—"

"—yes?"

"I'll see you soon" he said, hanging up the phone. She let out a heavy sigh and threw her phone on the floor.

"_Urgh_" she said, dusting her pants. "I'm done moping. I am engaged. He loves me. That is that" she said firmly, grabbing Jane's hand. Her phone made a sound as she was leaving the room—she reached for it and read: "I cannot wait to spend the rest of my life with you Lizzie, sweet dreams my princess". A smile appeared on her face and she tucked her phone back into her pocket.

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><p>"Ah Mr. Bennet, we are so lucky!" said Mrs. Bennet as they lay that night in bed.<p>

"Yes we are my dear" answered Mr. Bennet squeezing her hand lightly.

"Lizzie is marrying such a fine boy—did you see the way he looks at her? And his family adores her!" shirked Mrs. Bennet, turning to face her husband. Mr. Bennet gave his wife a faint smile and attempted to remove the slight sadness he noticed on Lizzie's face. No one had noticed, except Jane, that wasn't static. He thought his second to eldest daughter was gold and wanted her to marry for love. That David loved her, of that there was no doubt, but did Lizzie reciprocate the love? He shook those thoughts out his head and contended himself to think that if she really didn't, she wouldn't have accepted the marriage proposal.

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><p>"I love you" murmured David, reaching for her hand and plating a soft kiss on the palm. Lizzie smiled fondly at her fiancé. He reached in and softly kissed her lips, slipping one hand behind her neck. The stewardess walked by and coughed slightly, suggesting that they break off their embrace. With a grin on his face, David pulled away, smiling fondly at his future bride.<p>

"I have never been so happy Lizzie" said David, squeezing her hand.

"I love you" she said, giving him a kiss on the cheek, as they had just been censured for kissing deeply.

"What is your plan today?"

"I'm meeting with a friend…" said Lizzie, looking down uncomfortably, "And I have to finish some work before I return to school. I should probably start my Master's Thesis since with the wedding and all it will be hard to finish"

"I hope you get some interviews for the schools you wanted…"

"Yeah…I mean my heart was set on Harvard but—"

"—there is no but. We'll cross that bridge when we get to it. I can find a job there for four years and maybe you can differ for a year so I can finish my Residency or we'll travel back and forth—"

"—we are not spending our first year of marriage traveling back and forth!"

"Distance makes the heart grow fonder" teased David, "But you are right, trust me, I don't want to wake up and not see your face in the morning"

"How romantic" tease d Lizzie, squeezing his hand.

The rest of the plane ride went on smoothly—with a few kisses here and there. Everyone on first class could tell that these were lovebirds. He was completely head over heels for her and even though she was less effusive in her care for him, it was evident she deeply cared for him.

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><p>William Darcy was eagerly waiting on the corner for Lizzie to arrive. He looked down at his watch and when he looked up, she appeared in sight. He was taken aback by her beauty. I guess like the song goes, "You don't realize what you got till it's gone".<p>

"Hi" he said awkwardly, not moving in for a hug.

"Hey Will" she said, ignoring the butterflies in her stomach. The sun's ray shined on her finger, reflecting off her immense ring. The flashing drew his attention and the thought that someone had already claimed her, was like a dagger in his heart.

"Want to go inside?" he suggested, opening the door to Starbucks. They sat down on a corner table, after they had ordered their drinks. Lizzie sipped her green tea as she waited for him to begin the conversation.

"I…" began Darcy, clearing his throat. "I need to be laconic and just say it straight out" Lizzie looked up and noticed hesitance in his eyes. He did not even know where to begin. "I missed you this past few months, I cannot imagine my life without you Lizzie…my first thought as I got my acceptance letter to Harvard was to call you. I imagined us living in Boston together, attending Harvard…married"

Lizzie's face dropped. She swallowed hard and remained mute, not knowing how to respond.

"Is this a joke?" she finally said, after a few moments.

"No, I…I didn't realize how I felt about you till—"

"—till I got engaged to someone else, huh? I can't believe you are doing this. I waited for you Will, I'm not waiting any longer" she said, standing up and reaching for her bag.

"Wait" said Will, grabbing her hand. Electricity went up her arm, as his hand touched hers.

"Wait? I did that, for a year" answered Lizzie, "Did you not realize that I was waiting for you to do _something_? Every time the phone would ring, every time we would speak on Skype, every e-mail, text and bbm conversation, my heart fluttered at the thought that you would finally man up and do something. But you didn't...I told you I was dating David last summer, you knew that. Why didn't you say anything then?"

"I didn't think you would get married…I was busy with applications and this happened after my MCATS, I was caught up in my own things"

"And now I'm busy trying to live my life. You expected me to break off my engagement? Is that what you thought would happen after this conversation?"

"I didn't think about that but I know that I cannot let you marry someone else"

"I'm sorry, but you are late…" said Lizzie. She threw her cup in the garbage and walked out, leaving a hurt Will behind.

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><p>Author's Note: Thoughts are of course welcomed...<p> 


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3:**

_Silently waiting for you to realize,_

_That what you are searching for is me._

_One day you'll crawl back and apologize,_

_Though, unfortunately, I'll just burst your glee._

_No one can wait forever,_

_And I'm no exception._

_You might consider yourself very clever._

_But in this regard, you have a fault perception._

_Can't you see the way I look at you?_

_Can't you hear my heart beating when we speak?_

_From you, I have to eschew_

_As I don't know how much longer till my tears begin to leak._

_I hope you realize, before it's too late,_

_That I waited for you, and clearly, made a mistake._

Lizzie looked at the poem that she had written a few months ago, as tears strolled down her face. A tear fell on the piece of paper, landing on the word "mistake". She sat up straight and put on her computer. Impulsively, she began to read their old conversations, smiling at different points. Taking a deep breath, she deleted each one from her mailbox, hoping to never read them again. Darcy was in the past and David was her future.

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><p>Mrs. Bennet could not stop rambling about ribbons, colors and dresses to Lizzie. If Lizzie heard the word "flowers", "wedding" and "planning" one more time she was literally going to puke. Making some excuse to hang up the phone, Lizzie left her mom hanging on wedding details. It had been a few days since Lizzie had spoken to Darcy. Winter break was officially over and she went back to school. She had enough to distract her…except that Darcy was in the same campus as where she was getting her Masters. He was working for the Dean during his gap year, while she had decided to do a one year Masters. They had often seen each other—sometimes ending up having coffee or a meal together. But it had never crossed the line of friendship, or so Lizzie sadly reminded herself. There were times where she wondered whether the whole relationship was in her head of whether he genuinely cared for her. It was obvious that he thought highly of her—but she doubted whether his care went anywhere deeper.<p>

She was on her computer, checking her e-mail, when Jane messaged her on Skype. She went on visible (she was always on invisible) and chatted away with her dear sister. Within minutes, Darcy was also online. _Odd_, she thought. She knew that he rarely went on visible on Skype. She stayed a few minutes on and then got off—to see what he would do. Within minutes, he was also off.

This little game infuriated her further. Though it was possible that by "coincidence" he was on at the same time as her—she was pissed off. She was definitely not going to make the first move and talk to him, he ought to have known that. This reminded her of their relationship the weeks before his MCATs. After graduation, they had decided to take a break from their research while Darcy studied for his MCAT. They didn't speak for a month—which felt like torture to Lizzie. She would often re-read some of their conversations, to remind herself of his humor. It happened a couple of times during that time period that they would play this "Skype game". Whether it was real or all in Lizzie's head was irrelevant. Throughout their relationship, he had never been the man. She was done playing games. She played enough games with him. Infuriated, she signed off Skype and shut her computer off.

David texted her to notify that he was going to be a few minutes late. Lizzie blinked twice at the name. Oh yeah, her fiancé.

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><p>"What are you doing?" asked Georgiana in abrasive tone.<p>

"Georgi—stop" said Darcy. She went on his bed and watched him stare at the Skype screen.

"Um, should I be worried?" she asked, looking intently at him.

"No" he said, putting down the screen of the computer. "Georgi, what do you want?" he asked impatiently.

"Nothing, I just came to see why you been a-wall since you got into Harvard. Anyone would think you are mourning here. Even grandpa asked why you seemed so down"

"I'm fine" he responded, fixing his glasses, "Super duper fine"

"Okay, Mr. Sixth-grader. I'm just saying, if you want to talk…I'm here for you bro" she said, putting her hand on his shoulder.

"There is nothing to say" he murmured, "I was a fool"

"Never thought you'd admit that out loud. Guess she really had an affect on you" teased Georgiana.

"Yeah well, I was dumb. I had the most amazing woman in front of me and didn't even notice…"

"So that's it? You've given up? This is not the Will I know! You are assiduous when it comes to your dreams—is this also not one of your dreams?" Before he could respond she continued, "She clearly loves you. I saw it in her eyes when I met her. I'm surprised you didn't see it before. She loves you, _fight_ for her"

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><p><strong>Author's Note<strong>: It is interesting that out of all my stories this one seems to be getting the least "attention". Regardless, it is very close to my heart. I wrote that poem for someone and a lot of what Lizzie is feeling, are emotions that I'm going through. It is hard when you are stuck in between friendship and something more and its even worse when something else, that is equally great, comes along...how long can a girl wait? How long should she wait?_ sigh_.


	4. Chapter 4

_**Author's Note**_: The next few chapters will be flashbacks from Lizzie and Darcy's POV. They will give more insight into the story. Once the flashbacks catch up to where we are now, we'll go back to the "present" and get to the end. I hope you like the way I've set this up and that you enjoy this story! The story's present time is winter break so around January. This is going back to the previous summer, around June.

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><p><strong>Ch 4:<strong>

"Ahhh, in one week his MCATS will be over!" murmured Lizzie to Jane. They were sitting on Lizzie's bed, while she was typing on her computer. "I miss him" she in an inaudible whisper, though Jane heard it.

"Lizzie—I don't think this relationship is healthy…" said Jane, in her ethereal, sweet voice. She had attempted to tell Lizzie that she was getting a bit _obsessed_, for a lack of better word. But it was not in Jane's character to be that straightforward. She was always placid and carried herself with utmost propriety.

"There is no relationship" snapped Lizzie bitterly. She put her arms on her face and blew into them.

"Exactly" said Jane, getting to the point she had intended.

"I know that after his test, he will make a move. He broke up with Caroline only two months ago and now he had his MCATS to worry about—you don't _know _him, I do. It just takes him a while, that's all" said Lizzie, trying to convince herself as well. Deep down she knew that he cared for her, but why hadn't he shown interest? That was the million dollar question. There was no doubt in her mind that he had also felt the way they connected. Or had he? Why wasn't Darcy pellucid?

"Lizzie, I hate to sound like Lydia, well _she_ does make sense sometimes" joked Jane, "But if a guy is into you, he will come to you"

"I know" murmured Lizzie, wanting to change the subject. No one understood. Was she being obsessive? Was she foolish herself? She tried many times to be objective of the situation. But it is difficult to step out when your heart is in. She kept hearing Lydia's voice ring in her head: "_If you have to ask, he is not that into you_".

"He is on Skype!" said Lizzie suddenly, seeing his name online. She had been on invisible so he couldn't see her. She went on visible to see if he would do anything. Twenty minutes later he signed off—without saying goodbye. Jane heard Lizzie murmur something at the computer before closing it.

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><p>That afternoon, Lydia was trying on a tawdry outfit when Lizzie knocked on her door.<p>

"Can I help you?" she asked in a very sarcastic voice, hinting at her to leave.

"No…" said Lizzie, sitting down on Lydia's bed.

"Okay…" said Lydia, looking confused. "So why are you here?"

"Haha" laughed Lizzie, "no beating around the bush with you"

"Nope. Not my style. What's up?"

"What are you wearing?" asked Lizzie, distracted by the gaudy mini-skirt. "It's _trashy_ Lydia"

"It serves the purpose that I want it to serve" answered Lydia, smirking at her sister.

"Which is what exactly?" said Lizzie, putting her hands on her hips.

"Get guy's attention" she answered with a devilish smile, "But now, _unto you_. What happened this time with this good for nothing Darcy?"

"He is a very nice guy!" defended Lizzie, not realizing how something must be off if she had to keep constantly defending him.

"Yeah okay, I'm not reneging what I said. What's up?"

"Wow, that's a big word—renege?" teased Lizzie.

"I unfortunately learned something in that dumb Kaplan SAT course" murmured Lydia, rolling her eyes.

"Unfortunately" said Lizzie, sitting down on her bed.

"Yes, very, though the professor was _fine_! What? Don't give me that face! Don't pretend like you haven't imagine doing _something something_ with your imaginary beau"

"He is not imaginary" mumbled Lizzie. "Okay, whatever, I came to ask you for help because I have a date tomorrow night"

"WHAT? That prick finally asked you out?" asked Lydia, completely shocked.

"No, not exactly…" answered Lizzie. "My friend, Ruby, called. She had wanted to set me up with this guy David, you know the Collins, Dr. Collins?"

"_The_ Collins?" asked Lydia, her mouth opened wide.

"Yeah" said Lizzie, looking at her hands.

"OMG! They are so freaking rich! You are going to be a millionaire!"

"Lydia, please pretend to act mature and not be so effusively shallow" answered Lizzie in her serious tone.

"What for?" asked Lydia, shrugging her shoulders. Lizzie rolled her eyes at her sister. Some things just didn't change. "So what do you need help for?"

"I don't know if I should go and Jane is out and I'm just confused" answered Lizzie.

"Okay, there is no confusion here. Are you dating someone else? Do not even pretend that you are because if you say you are that is just plain creepy and I would actually be scared. Okay so since we've established that, you are going out with him! He is a perfectly good, _rich_, catch" she added with a wink.

"But—" interrupted Lizzie.

"—_no buts_! Let me know how it goes and get out so I can finish getting ready" she said, looking back at her reflection. She winked at herself in the mirror.

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><p>"Hello? Can I speak with Lizzie?" said a voice on the other line.<p>

"This is she" answered Lizzie.

"Hi, this is David, Ruby gave me your number"

"Oh hi, how are you?"

"Good, a bit nervous" he answered honestly, "I don't usually do blind dates"

"Me neither" said Lizzie, laughing with him. After a few minutes of small talk he asked if tomorrow night at six o'clock worked for her. After agreeing on a time, they hung up the phone.

* * *

><p>"Georgiana, can you please keep it down?" grunted Darcy, trying to concentrate on his practice exam. His entire focus was on this test. He <em>needed<em> to do really well. His mind was very restive—nothing peripheral could enter it. Everything had to be focused on the MCATS. He had gone on Skype earlier that day when he was taking a break. He noticed Lizzie was on but he didn't talk to her. He missed talking to her but his mind had only room for one thing: the MCATs.

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><p><em><strong>Author's Note<strong>_: Hope you liked it! thoughts and suggestions are welcomed! ;)


	5. Chapter 5

_**Author's Note**_: I'm so excited that people are liking the story and I hope you continue to enjoy it! As I mentioned in the previous chapter, we are now going back to the past and then catching up with the future. Even though we are not going to back to the moment when Lizzie and Darcy met, it will be talked about throughout the story. So now we are back to the summer before Lizzie gets engaged. They both just graduated college, etc.

I have to give another disclaimer: I usually tend to develop a lot of characters in stories, not just focusing in on the main characters. I fear that this story will be different and there will be much more on Lizzie-Darcy versus others.

on David Collins: so I see that most are (pleasantly) surprised that David Collins is a catch in my story! I wanted to make him as lovable and likable as possible! If its one thing that I think Austen fails with is presenting another amiable possibility to her heroines. Even Mr. Elliot in Persuasion is not a real choice since he turns out to be bad. You are supposed to love David in my story-if you are torn by the end of who she should pick then I've done my job. The truth is that I haven't decided yet who she will end up...perhaps you can help me with that decision?

Looking forward to hearing your thoughts!

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><p><strong>Ch. 5<strong>:

Lizzie looked in the mirror and was pleased with her reflection. Even though her stomach was churning, she had managed to fix herself up rather nicely. Most importantly, it was the first time in weeks that her thoughts were occupied with someone _other_ than Darcy.

She hated first dates—it was hard for her to be herself when she felt she was being sized up with every word she uttered. This might be different because she knew David Collins. Not well, _per se_, but she had seen him around since they were children. He was a few years older than her—so they naturally had never really interacted. However, since their parents had lived nearby, they had sporadically seen each other. There was something about him that had always attracted her to him. His soft blue eyes were so peaceful and kind—aside from that, every rumor about him sparkled with encomium.

In the back of her head she had always held David as the ideal man for her. Words could not convey what she saw and admired in him. But she reminded herself that she didn't _know_ him. This was all perhaps part of her imagination—which painted this ideal picture. Regardless, once she got to her senior year of college and met Darcy, she forgot all about David. It wasn't as much she forgot him, as she _realized _that what she really wanted was already in front of her. Even though Lizzie had always been rational, she was completely taken by Will. Yes, they had originally butted heads a little bit. Two strong personalities tend to do that, but overall, she felt he was her match. She thought he must have felt something too—but his reserved personality did not allow her to decipher that part of him.

It is difficult to describe in words the feeling of one's soul connecting perfectly with another. In order to do it justice, it is sufficed to say that their level of connection was something she had never felt before. She still held her guard and did not open up _too_ quickly. They were, after all, in a working relationship. Little by little, their conversation began to expand beyond their scope of their work and their friendship began to thrive.

Darcy never made her cry—at least not intentionally. A few months into their "working relationship" (a term she constantly repeated to herself in hopes it would keep her feelings in check), Lizzie found out he had a girlfriend. The way he said it—or rather, the way he avoided telling her, felt like knives being stuck in her soul. After months of talking—the subject had never come up. He spoke of a certain "contact" in NYU that could be beneficiary in expanding their work. But when Lizzie would ask who this person was—the question was always dutifully ignored. Lizzie was innately stubborn so naturally, she did not desist. After some equivocating he finally relented and told her via an email, "don't get upset but it is my girlfriend".

"Don't get upset? DON'T GET UPSET?" she wanted to scream. The way he said it was more hurtful than the actual content. He thought she would get upset? From that moment on she became a bit colder towards him—guarding her own feelings.

Thinking about this, got her upset and she quickly shook those thoughts out of her head. She was doing so well being distracted by the idea of David. The truth was that she _was_ excited to go out with him. As if on cue, the doorbell rang.

"Lizzie!" said Mrs. Bennet in an overly excited voice, "Dr. Collins is here!" she added, admiring the way "Doctor" sounded in front of the name of the man that was taking out her daughter.

"Hi" said Lizzie, relieved to see him smiling in admiration.

"Ready?" he asked. She nodded and kissed her parents goodbye. They walked out of her house in silence, each too nervous to speak. He gallantly opened up the door for her and then walked around to his side.

"I remember you" said Lizzie, as he turned on the engine. He smiled at her unexpected comment and turned to look at her. "You know, from when we were younger…you used to always be carrying a backpack—I assume it was filled with books?"

"Yes, you remember that?" he asked in disbelief, "It did have some books—I guess I was bit a nerdy or I guess, still am" he answered, shrugging his shoulders.

"I've always had a thing for nerds" said Lizzie, smiling at him. She noticed he blushed at her comment. This was the perfect ice breaker. Their conversation flowed into the evening and not once, did Lizzie think of Darcy.

David drove up the Bennet's home and looked at his watch in disbelief.

"It's almost one!" he said, "We've been out for five hours"

"I think that's a good sign" said Lizzie, smiling widely. He was everything she had imagined.

"I'd say so" he added, smiling back at her. She bit her lip nervously and looked towards the window. David got out of the car and opened her door, helping her get out.

"David, I had such a nice time, thank you" she said, looking at him in the eyes.

"Me too Lizzie" he answered, walking alongside her to the door. "Can I call you again?"

"Hhmmm" teased Lizzie, pretending she was thinking. "Of course" she said in between chuckles.

"Good night" he said, leaning in and giving her a kiss on the cheek. Lizzie smiled.

"Good night" she murmured, as she watched him go. She turned around to open the door but he called out to her.

"Lizzie—" he added, turning back to face her, "I remember you too". Lizzie smiled widely and waved at him again before opening her door.

* * *

><p>The drive back to his home passed with alacrity. His head as filled with thoughts about their date. Lizzie was everything he had thought she was going to be. It was patent to him that she was special. He pulled to his house and entered his home quietly. His mom was waiting up for him.<p>

"How did it go?" she asked eagerly, surprised by the lateness of the hour, "I'm assuming by the length of your date that it went well". David smiled fondly at his mom. She would often repudiate his girlfriends because she felt they were lacking something of importance. Even though they hadn't met, she could tell by David's expression that he must have impressed him.

"So not your usual, pedestrian date?" probed his mom, hoping to get more information out of him. He laughed at her question.

"No, definitely not pedestrian…" he answered, smiling widely. "Good night mom" he added, giving her a kiss on the cheek.

"Good night son" she whispered, watching go upstairs. She took off her glasses and turned off the lights, making her way to her room.

* * *

><p>Lizzie tip-toed inside her house quietly—hoping not to wake anybody up. To her surprise, Lydia was in the family room, watching TV. She popped her head to say hello.<p>

"Let me guess, he is absolutely adorable and hunky and you have decided to forget that prick Will?" asked Lydia, looking up from the TV.

"Good morning Lydia" said Lizzie calmly, not allowing a smile to creep on her lips.

"Well?" prompted Lydia, placing her hands on her hips. Lizzie sat next to her sister and allowed her body to fully plummet on the couch.

"He is great…" murmured Lizzie, "He is amazing, he is just not Will". Lydia furrowed her eyebrows and slapped sister's arm.

"Snap out of it Lizzie!" she said harshly, "I'm sorry but you need to get over that prick—the most incredible guy is knocking at your door and you are going to hesitate because of an imaginary relationship?" Lydia knew those words would hurt Lizzie but she needed to hear it. Lizzie looked down, wiping a tear from her eye.

"Good night Lydia" she said, getting up and leaving with alacrity.


	6. Chapter 6

**Ch 6**:

Lizzie got in her room, closed the door and let out a heavy sigh. She needed to recollect herself. She did have a great time—David was absolutely as wonderful as she had imagined. They laughed, talked and enjoyed each other's company. But there was something missing. She wanted to kick herself for being so freaking stubborn. Lydia was right. She had the most incredible guy and she was willing to hesitate for an imaginary relationship? Because imaginary it was. Darcy hadn't shown romantic interest in their eight months of friendship. Not once did he insinuate anything. Yes, he flirted with her and she flirted back. But as she often would remind herself, that was the end of it. Even though something inside of her knew he also liked her—it's impossible he hadn't felt their connection, she needed to let him go. Ironically she knew that when she let him go, he would come back on his own. The moment she would set her heart free—he would come back claiming it back.

Taking in a deep breath, Lizzie opened up her laptop and began writing on her journal. It was the best way for her to let off some steam. She wrote a quick poem:

I wish you missed me,

Like I miss you.

Do you think of me?

As often as I think of you?

She stopped typing and stared at the screen. This is so sad, she thought to herself. She was done debating. She was done moping. Goodbye Darcy. She shut off her computer and went to sleep.

* * *

><p>The next morning, the usual cacophony filled the Bennet household. Everyone was at breakfast: Mrs. Bennet, Mr. Bennet, Jane and Lizzie. Lydia was, as expected, still sleeping.<p>

"Lizzie!" said Mrs. Bennet, curtailing Mr. Bennet's conversation. "How was last night?" Lizzie ignored the feeling of chagrin that her mom's over enthusiastic interest in her love life caused. She was still trying to figure out how she felt—having her mom interrogate her was not going to help. And even though Lizzie loved her mom, she knew she could not keep anything inside. The minute their conversation was over, Lizzie knew Mrs. Bennet would be called Mrs. Lucas and start announcing a wedding date.

"Great mom" answered Lizzie softly, sitting at the table, next to Jane. Jane gave her a knowing smile, as if saying, "_You know mom_". "Yes I do" whispered Lizzie to Jane, making her laugh. After capitulating to her mom's questioning, Lizzie retired from the table and went to the library, nearby their house.

In between practice tests, Lizzie took out her phone to see if anyone had tried contacting her. To her surprise, she had a text from David:

"Hey Lizzie—good morning! Busy tonight?"

"Hey, sorry I was studying. Nope. Not busy as of yet…"

"No worries! Okay great, pick you up at five? I wanted to take you to my favorite place"

"Sounds good, looking forward"

"Me too"

Lizzie smiled at her phone and put it away.

* * *

><p>"Are you curious?" teased David, as they pulled away from Lizzie's house.<p>

"A tad" answered Lizzie, feeling like she wasn't really there. Her body was in the car but her mind was elsewhere. They drove for approximately ten minutes till they got to their destination.

"Oh my" whispered Lizzie, her eyes opening in delight. "I love the beach too" she whispered, smiling widely.

"Sunset is my favorite" he explained.

"I used to come here when I was younger—whenever something tough was going on, this was my haven" said Lizzie, reminiscing on all the nights she had spent at the beach thinking, writing and praying. They parked the car and went by the shore. David came fully prepared. He pulled out a picnic sheet and a basket filled with food.

"I'm impressed" said Lizzie, smiling at David. He was so amazing. She felt she didn't deserve him. After a pleasant afternoon, David looked towards Lizzie, who was still staring at the horizon.

"Lizzie" said David, in a serious tone.

"Hhhmm?" asked Lizzie, looking away from the sunset and facing towards him.

"Is there someone else in your life?" he asked. Lizzie was taken aback. Her face of shocked probed him to continue. "I would never suggest that you are dating someone else simultaneously but I just feel like you are emotionally withdrawn"

"I'm sorry" murmured Lizzie, looking down. She let out a heavy sigh, "I'm not dating anyone else"

"Then what is it?" he asked, leaning and reaching for her hand. "Is someone else on your mind?" _Yes_, Lizzie wanted to confess. But she couldn't because there truly wasn't. I mean, Darcy was on her mind but there was nothing going on between them. For her to admit that she was thinking of someone that probably wasn't thinking of her was too painful.

"No, no there isn't" she answered honestly. "I am sorry if you feel like I've been holding back. It just takes me a while to open up"

"I believe in honesty as the foundation of any relationship. Lizzie, I've never met anyone like you. I know it's only our second date, but I feel like I've known you for much longer. I am excited about this—I am serious about dating. I'm twenty seven, I want to settle down. I just want to make sure that we are both on the same page" he said honestly. Lizzie smiled at him. She loved how honest and straightforward he was. Darcy was not like that. Lizzie would spend hours trying to decipher what he was thinking and why he was doing something.

"I understand and I'm also serious. I'm in no rush, but if the right person comes along, I'm open to it. I'm glad you are open with me and I hope you know that we can always discuss anything" she answered, hoping she had abated his fears. His comment made her realize that she needed to make a choice. She couldn't keep her heart in abeyance.

"Good" he said, smiling at her. "Ready to head back?" he asked, starting to get up. Lizzie nodded and he extended his arm, helping her rise.

"Thanks" she muttered.

"My pleasure" he said, not letting go of her hand.


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's Note**: I hope you enjoy this update! I also hope that you can feel the mix of disparate emotions that Lizzie is feeling. I know she is very vulnerable right now and that is not the typical Lizzie that we see but even in her vulnerability, she tries to be strong. Furthermore, we see how Darcy has really gotten to her. I tried to keep her emotions raw and most importantly, relateable. I hope that comes accross...

* * *

><p><strong>Ch. 7: Jar of Broken Hearts<strong>

Lizzie was doing her nails while listening to music when Lydia burst into her room.

"Yes?" asked Lizzie, not looking up from her current focus.

"I heard a rumor…" said Lydia, jumping on the bed and making Lizzie mess up.

"Lydia!" grunted Lizzie, looking at her nails in annoyance.

"Hot date?" she asked, winking.

"Actually, yes, we are going out to dinner if you must know" said Lizzie, smiling. "So, what's the rumor?" asked Lizzie, knowing her sister had meant to spark her interest.

"That you like Collins" teased Lydia, smirking at her sister. "Admit it!" she said, grabbing a pillow as a potential weapon.

"I do" said Lizzie, in between chuckles. "I do" she said again, letting out a heavy sigh. It had been two weeks since they started dating and she almost forgotten about Darcy. A week had already passed after his MCAT and he still had not called. It was weird. She had considered texting him the day of his test wishing him good luck but decided against it. They had left off saying that _he_ would contact _her_ after his MCAT to discuss future projects. Even though it took a lot of self control to not text him—since she did genuinely want to wish him good luck—she was happy she didn't. She wanted him to man up and be the one to approach her. She was excited to see with what alacrity he would contact her. She had suffered the past month and a half, thinking about him constantly. It was a rude awakening to feel like he hadn't also. She had hoped that he would have called her the next day—wanting to share how the test went. But he didn't. A week had already passed and he was still MIA.

"Hello?" asked Lydia, waving at Lizzie. "Are you there? You spaced out for like a minute"

"Sorry" muttered Lizzie, snapping back into reality.

"Please don't tell me you were thinking about that prick" said Lydia knowing full well the answer. "The day I met him…" she muttered through her teeth.

"Back to David" said Lizzie.

"That's more like it!" said Lydia, smiling. She knew Lizzie had an obsessive streak which also showed in her perseverance. When her mind became focused—she never gave up! But it unfortunately translated to guys as well. It killed Lydia and Jane that Lizzie was wasting time and energy thinking about this guy. Though Lizzie would often defend him, Lydia knew he wasn't interest. _If you have to ask if he is interested—he ain't_!

* * *

><p>It was the last week of July and Lizzie was in her room studying. After finishing a practice exam she checked her phone and was shocked to see a missed call: William Darcy. Her heart missed a beat. She grabbed her phone and stared at the name in disbelief. <em>That prick had the audacity to make me wait for two weeks after his test! He is going to have to wait for me to call him back<em>. Unfortunately, her excitement didn't let her make him suffer for _too_ long and she called him about an hour later. Her heart sped up as the phone rang.

"Hello?" she asked, trying to control her voice.

"Hey Lizzie!" said Will, in his usual unreadable tone. "How are you?"

"Great" said Lizzie, upset at him. "How was your test?" she asked. She had practiced this conversation for the past two weeks. She had planned on making a cute joke or flirting with him. But now that he was on the other line, the last thing she wanted was to show any interest. There was no excuse. He said he would get in touch with her after his test and he waited two weeks. Is that what she meant to him? Clearly, he hadn't missed her like she missed him.

"It was good" he said, letting out a cough, "Though I got sick right after. I don't know what I had—it's been a rough two weeks, sorry I didn't call before". Lizzie's heart sunk. Of course he had a legitimate excuse. Her plan to loath him forever backfired and now she was just as enamored as she had been two months ago. Her fluttered with preoccupation for her beloved and she softly inquired after his health.

"I'm good, thanks" he answered, coughing again, "Much better anyways. What have you been up to?" Lizzie hesitated whether to tell him straight out about David or not. She had planned, while she built up anger towards him, to let it out like a bomb in the hopes of hurting him. It sounded cruel but she had endured so much emotional pain because of him—she wanted to make him feel like she had felt.

"You know…busy" muttered Lizzie, not knowing what else to say.

"Do you want to Skype? I prefer to speak in person" he said, making Lizzie hesitate. I want to see your face too, thought Lizzie to herself.

"I'm actually in the middle of getting ready" explained Lizzie.

"For what?" asked Will, surprised by her tone of voice.

"I'm going to dinner with my" she gulped, "Boyfriend". _There, the truth was out_.

"Oh, I didn't you know had a boyfriend" said Will nonchalantly. Lizzie hated that she could never read his voice.

"You never asked" said Lizzie, because he _never_ had. "But we just started going out in the summer" she added, feeling guilty.

"Okay, well maybe when you get back or tomorrow?" asked Will.

"Yeah, I'll text you when I get back but it'll probably be late and I know you like to sleep early so maybe better tomorrow?"

"Sound good"

"Bye" whispered Lizzie, hanging up the phone in utter disbelief. She needed a distraction—anything. She opened up her itunes and pressed on the first song that she saw: "Jar of Broken Hearts" by Cristina Perri. _How apropos_. She sang out loud to the song, letting her raw emotions connect with the words of the song.

_I know I can't take one more step towards you  
>'Cause all that's waiting is regret<br>And don't you know I'm not your ghost anymore?  
>You lost the love I loved the most<em>

_And I learned to live, half-alive_  
><em>And now you want me one more time<em>

_And who do you think you are?_  
><em>Runnin' 'round leaving scars<em>  
><em>Collecting your jar of hearts<em>  
><em>And tearing love apart<em>

_You're gonna catch a cold_  
><em>From the ice inside your soul<em>  
><em>So don't come back for me<em>  
><em>Who do you think you are?<em>

_I hear you're asking all around_  
><em>If I am anywhere to be found<em>  
><em>But I have grown too strong<em>  
><em>To ever fall back in your arms<em>

_And I learned to live, half-alive_  
><em>And now you want me one more time<em>.

She pressed pause to the song and wiped away the tears that kept precipitating from her eyes. She had finally stopped thinking about him. And now, he decided to stroll back into her life. The words of the song kept resonating in her head: "_I can't take one more step towards you, because all that is waiting is regret_…"

* * *

><p><em><strong>Author's Note<strong>_: What did you think? I personally loved this chapter, I know, I'm biased. I've also purposely left out Darcy's thoughts because I want the reader to completely relate to Lizzie's angst and confusion.

**NYT**: haha yes, now we are in the era of computer journals. yes, david is very straightforward and he is the complete foil of Darcy, though as will be shown, they do have a lot in common. I also wonder that! we'll see how this story develops, it in many ways represents my own thoughts and confusions about love and relationships. David is a great guy, they would be great and live happily together...but yet she is pulled towards darcy. is it imagination? fantasy? is it even real?

**brunette7856**: thank you! im glad that you feel that way, that is DEF one of my goals. let me know if I was able to convey the feelings will in this chapter...

**Georgiana**: haha yes, he is meant to be! if you are falling in love with him and are hesitating who is the best one for her, then im doing a good job as an author! we'll see what happens...I really do not know. Unlike many authors i dont plan ahead what will happen in each chapter, though i have an idea i try to let the characters write the story as it progresses...sometimes they take me to unexpected places...


	8. Chapter 8

**Author's Note**: Thank you to everyone that reviewed! They really keep me enthusiastic about writing this story, even though I'm swamped with work. I hope you enjoy this chapter!

* * *

><p><strong>Ch. 8<strong>:

"Lizzie?" asked David, waving his hand in front of Lizzie, "are you there?" he added, letting out a chuckle.

"Yeah _sorry_" mumbled Lizzie, snapping back into reality.

"You seem a little off tonight, are you feeling okay?" he asked, leaning in with concern. She melted at the look of his soft vulnerable green eyes.

"You are so great" she murmured, putting her hands on his. He smiled at her comment and squeezed her hand softly.

"Can I get you anything else?" asked the waitress, interrupting their conversation. Without looking up, David answered while staring right into Lizzie's eyes.

"I have everything I need" he murmured, making her blush. She smiled fondly at him and even the waitress was impressed by his sweetness. "Would you like to dance?" he asked Lizzie, still staring intently into her beautiful sparkling eyes.

"There is no music" she whispered, looking around the restaurant. They were in an outside café that overlooked the beach.

"Come" he said, standing up and reaching for her hand. She followed him a few feet away from their table, where the back of the café was overlooking the water. With the background of the waves, he brought her close, as they moved slowly in a harmonious step.

"Are you like this with everyone?" asked Lizzie, partially teasing him. She was also interested in knowing if he was truly this amazing. She felt an immense amount of guilt that even while she was with him, she was thinking of Will...

He stopped dancing but remained closed to her.

"I believe that in order to make a relationship work, you _have_ to open up. In other words, you have to become vulnerable. Yes, there is a chance of getting hurt, but if you don't open up then you also miss out the chance to possibly find your soul mate. I'm not a big romantic. I think it's important to look for someone with similar goals—but ultimately, what matters is the commitment from both people to make this relationship work and to give everything to it" he answered, meaning every single word. "Though there is a chance I might get hurt, I want to open up myself completely to you. I want to share with you my life, my dreams, my goals, my flaws and my mistakes. I want to let you in…and I want you to let me in as well Lizzie"

Lizzie was listening with complete amazement. They had only been dating for a few weeks and she was already aware that she had never met someone like him. He was honest, emotionally mature and willing to invest in her…in _them_. She opened her mouth as if to say something and then closed it again. He leaned in as if prompting her to continue.

"Wow" she murmured, revealing a smile. "You are so great David" she added, looking at him in disbelief. "I don't know how I got this chance". He laughed at her compliment.

"Things happen at the right time. Though I had my eye on you for a while, I wasn't emotionally ready to invest in another person and in a relationship. I am now and I hope you are too" he said, stroking her cheek softly.

"I've gotten hurt before" murmured Lizzie, letting a tear fall from her eye. He gently wiped it with his thumb and looking lovingly into her eyes.

"Thank you for opening up to me" he whispered, kissing her lightly on the lips. "I can't promise that I won't hurt you dearest Lizzie, but I can promise that I will try to always make you happy. You can trust me. But I need to feel like I can trust you too, that you are willing to let me in". She nodded, putting her hands over his. More tears precipitated out as he kissed her again—more passionately than before. After what seemed like eternity, or perhaps a few seconds, Lizzie let out a heavy sigh.

"Where do I begin?" said Lizzie, letting out a laugh. "There are so many things I've never told anyone—so many struggles that I've never shared"

"Let's begin with what I need to know. I know I've asked you before but tell me, is there someone else in your life?" he asked in all earnest. Though it was forward, he didn't believe in equivocating and if this relationship was going to work, they needed to communicate.

"There was someone in my mind but we never went out or anything. He was a friend that only stayed a friend. Unlike you, as I've realized, he lacked the emotional maturity to invest in someone else other than himself" she answered honestly, feeling a huge feeling of relief now that she started to open up to him.

"I don't need to know all the details Lizzie" he added, knowing that she had already made a huge leap. "I just need to know that you are interested in _us_. No guy wants to compete for his girlfriend's heart. The same way I'm making the commitment to be loyal to you, it also entails emotional and intellectual honesty"

"You are right" said Lizzie, letting out another sigh. "I would never cheat on you David…I really like you" she added, truthfully acknowledging her feelings for him. She cupped his face and for the first time in their relationship, made the first initiative and kissed him. When she finally pulled out, he looked happily surprised.

"Okay" he said, giving her a side-ways smile, "Ready for some dessert?"

"I thought you had everything you wanted" she answered with a smirk. He loved her playfulness.

"I do" he answered seriously, looking into her eyes. Without thinking, Lizzie wrapped her arms around him and hugged him tightly, "Thank you" she murmured, kissing his neck.

* * *

><p>Darcy paced around his room unsure of what was bothering him. Usually, when he spoke with Lizzie, it would bring a sense of calmness and happiness. He was not the type to look deeply into his feelings—he always made judicious decisions but didn't dwell on his emotions. Shrugging his shoulders, he finally sat down and pulled out a book. This new, odd feeling was not pleasant—whatever it was.<p>

* * *

><p>"Thanks for tonight" said Lizzie, biting her lip nervously.<p>

"Lizzie, I…would I ask too much for you to come to dinner to my house, one night this week? I have to fly back to New York next week and I want my family to meet you before I leave" he asked. Lizzie felt this was a huge compliment. _The_ David Collins, the guy every girl wanted to even get a chance to date, was serious about her. And after their heartfelt conversation, Lizzie really wanted to let him in…

"I'd love to" she murmured, kissing him lightly on the cheek.

"Thank you" he answered, stroking her cheek lightly.

Lizzie went inside and for the first time in weeks, she felt like she was floating. She was excited about David. She was interested in being with him. In her newfound excitement, she completely forgot to text Darcy to tell him she was back.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note<strong>: as always, eargerly waiting to hear your thoughts ;) hope everyone has a nice week!


	9. Chapter 9

**Author's Note**: this is the last chapter that is going to be about the past. There are only going to be a few chapters left of this story. Next chapter will be where we left off. I hope you are enjoying reading this! I'm been loving writing this! I have tried to expressed raw emotions and I hope that you are connecting to their feelings. Though Lizzie might seem a bit obssessed or crazy, I've tried to explain how confused her feelings are. I've purposely avoided writing what Darcy has been thinking, but I added more of that this chapter. And now, without further ado...

* * *

><p><strong>Ch 9<strong>:

Darcy would sporadically look at his watch—waiting for Lizzie to call. He felt uncomfortable and had a hard time concentrating on his work. This was a new, odd feeling. Any blinking on his blackberry would make him excited and he only felt disappointed that it wasn't who he was expecting.

Will was not the type to be in touch his feelings. Though he was very bright, he was lacking in emotional intelligence. He knew something was bothering him but he couldn't decipher what it was. Pushing his emotions aside, he went to sleep at twelve, realizing the phone call he was expecting was not going to come.

He anxiously looked at his watch again. He couldn't believe it was already 11:30pm and Lizzie hadn't called. She wasn't the type to forget. She never forgot little things. On his birthday she had texted him at 6:45am because she knew that's when he woke up. This had to be anomaly. He wasn't sure why this was bothering him but it was. And now she had a boyfriend? It probably wasn't serious. The truth was he didn't know how often she dated. They had never spoken about _her_ in that sense. It wouldn't surprise him if guys did ask her out. The convivial energy she exuded attracted people like a magnet. He had never met someone like her before.

He shook the thoughts out of his head and let out a yawn. She must still be out. She couldn't have forgotten. Taking off his watch, he put his phone on silent and got in bed. She would call tomorrow. Either way, he didn't _really_ care.

* * *

><p>Lizzie woke up the next morning with a smile on her face. She was happy for the first time in months. It suddenly dawned on her that she hadn't called Darcy last night! She reached for her phone and quickly texted him: <em>Hey! Sorry about last night, I got back late. Let me know when you'd like to speak today<em>.

She was shocked he responded so fast._ How about in 20 min?_ he asked.

_Sure_, she responded and lifted herself up from her bed. Letting out a yawn, she stretched out and went to the bathroom. After washing her face and teeth, she quickly brushed her hair, loving the silky smoothness of her brown waves.

Putting on a soft zip-up, she turned on her computer and went on Skype. Within seconds Darcy was already calling her. Her stomach became tied up in knots and butterflies began to creep up like they always did before they would speak. She almost wanted to hit herself for allowing her emotions to run away with her.

"Hey" murmured Darcy, waving awkwardly through the computer. Lizzie consciously patted down her hair—realizing she forgot to put any make-up. If she _was_ considered detail-oriented then Darcy was detail-oriented-on-details. He would for sure notice. She shrugged her shoulders and forced herself to pretend to not care. She wanted to divest herself of her feelings for him. If only she could abrogate all the thoughts that kept invading her head…

After a few minutes of small talk, Lizzie's phone rang. She reached for it and saw it was David. A smile immediately crept on her face, which did not go unnoticed by Darcy.

"Who is it?" he asked, unaware of why her sudden excitement had irked him.

"One sec" she whispered, biting her lip. Letting out a heavy sigh of excitement, she raised her finger at Darcy, asking him to wait for a second. Her smile became vibrant as she answered his call. Will pretended not to care. He did not even realize that in fact he was very interested. Who was this David? How serious were they?

"Hhmm, yeah…okay, sure, ahh I'm so nervous to meet them! I know me too. Okay, we'll I'll call you back, I'm talking on skype with a friend. No I haven't told you about him yet..haha, okay, bye, you too" she said, her facial expressions accommodating to the different parts of the conversation.

"Sorry" she murmured, hanging up the phone. "It was David" she said dreamily, genuinely excited that he had called. Even with Will in front of her, she was happy that David had called. The irony of it all.

"Is everything okay?" asked Will, a polite way to find out what the subject matter of the conversation had been.

"Yeah, I'm just meeting his parents tomorrow and I'm super nervous! _Ahhh_" she said, biting her lip nervously. "I hope they like me!"

"I'm sure they will" whispered Will, _how could they not?_

"Sorry about the distraction, okay let's get back to business. We had discussed doing a presentation…"

"Yeah, right" murmured Will, getting refocused. "Let's get down to business" he agreed.

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><p>The last few weeks of summer flew by. Lizzie found herself thinking about two disparate guys ubiquitously, which was kind of driving her mad. She enjoyed David's company, she <em>did<em>, but there was still something about Darcy which would bring alive the butterflies in her stomach. Her sisters kept telling she was a fool. And perhaps she was. _Sigh_, she no longer knew.

The first semester of graduate school was the hardest semester of her life. She was swamped with work, graduate applications and life. David was busy in his second year of Residency which they had less time to spend together than they did in the summer. Even though they were busy, David made Lizzie his priority and their relationship was rapidly burgeoning into something special. It seemed only natural to David that on winter break, he should propose.

Lizzie did like David. She truly did. But she wasn't expected an engagement, though they had talked about their future together. They had each been so busy, that her thoughts were kind of scattered at the present moment. After she and Darcy had finished their presentation, they each went off into their own cocoon. . They would see each other sporadically and spend time talking—which would only rekindle the feelings that Lizzie had for him. She would want to hit herself in the foot every time she spent time with him.

So when winter break finally rolled along, Lizzie was happy to go home and put her thoughts, life and feelings in order. Little did she know that David had something very special planned.

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><p><strong>AN**: what did you think? How should the story pick up? What should Darcy to try to get Lizzie back?


	10. Chapter 10

**Author's Note: **Thank you to everyone that reviewed or made some sort of alert! It brings a smile to my face to know that people are enjoying this story as much as I'm enjoying writing it. This was a very special and difficult chapter to write...

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><p><strong>Ch. 10:<strong>

It had already been a week since they had last spoken. Lizzie attempted to divest herself of the thoughts that kept inundating her head. Memories of their friendship kept spurring up, creating havoc in her heart. Though she had felt that their connection was mutual, she hadn't expected Darcy to declare his love for her. In a way his lack of action had accustomed her. She was way past the months when she was constantly expecting something, _anything _from Will.

Her eyes swelled up with tears as she remembered all the moments they had shared. They hadn't been physical which perhaps had made them more powerful. Their connection was intellectual and emotional. David had noticed something was off. After the day she had lunch with her friend, Lizzie usually prolixity was gone. She was restive but would blame it on the wedding plans.

"You know my mom" muttered Lizzie, trying to convince herself that that was the reason for her current mood change. She was confused.

"How about you go out to lunch with Susan? She is dying to see you again" suggested David.

"Sure, that'd be great" said Lizzie "I'll call her after we hang up"

"Lizzie" said David, pausing for a moment, "I love you"

"I know" answered Lizzie, biting her lip nervously. "I know you do" she added. David pretended her response hadn't bothered him and did not attempt to read into it. She was having a rough week. This would pass.

After Lizzie hung up with David, she noticed her blackberry was lighting up. She had a new e-mail. Her heart started racing as she had a feeling it was from Will. It was. She nervously opened the e-mail, sitting on her chair for support.

"_I can no longer remain in silence. I must speak to you by such means as are within my reach. You pierce my soul. I am half agony, half hope. Tell me not that I am too late, that such precious feelings are gone forever. I offer myself to you again with a heart even more your own than it was when we first met. Dare not say that man forgets sooner than woman, that his love has an earlier death. I have loved none but you. Unaware I may have been, weak and stupid I have been, but never inconstant. You alone have unconsciously directed my actions. For you alone, I think and plan. Have you not seen this? Have you failed to see my inner wishes like I failed to see them earlier? I can hardly write. I must go, uncertain of my fate; but I shall return hither, or follow you, as soon as possible. A word, a look, will be enough to decide whether I approach you again or not. One word from you will silence me on the subject forever_"

Lizzie put down her phone and sunk into the chair. He had modeled the letter after her two favorite Austen characters: Mr. Darcy and Captain Wentworth. Such a letter was not to be soon recovered from. Half and hour's solitude and reflection might have tranquillized her; but the ten minutes only which now passed before she was interrupted, with all the restraints of her situation, could do nothing towards tranquility. Every moment rather brought fresh agitation.

Her placid ephemeral escape was interrupted by Susan's phone call. Lizzie answered the phone with an attenuated voice, feeling all of her emotions swell up by her throat. Albeit reluctantly, Lizzie decided to meet Susan for lunch.

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><p>Lizzie was having lunch with Susan, David's sister, when Darcy walked in to the restaurant. Their faces looked equally flabbergasted. He knew she had read his letter. They locked eyes but were suddenly interrupted by the sound of lighting. Lizzie looked towards the window and saw water pouring heavily. She glanced back towards the door and noticed Will simply standing there, frozen. He looked awkwardly down, muttered to himself and left the restaurant—walking out into the rain.<p>

"Who was that?" asked Susan, looking back towards the door to see who Lizzie had been staring at so intently.

"An old friend" murmured Lizzie, staring at the spot where Will had been standing. "Excuse me" she added, getting up from the table and putting her napkin down. Susan started as she walked out suddenly, unsure of what was happening. Lizzie flung open the door of the restaurant and ran after Will, getting completely soaked from the pouring rain.

"Why didn't you tell me before?" screamed Lizzie, grabbing his arm and turning him around. They were both soaking wet and standing in the middle of the sidewalk. She was breathing heavily and was staring straight into his eyes.

"I…I didn't know what I wanted" he muttered, taken aback by Lizzie's presence. He hadn't planned on seeing her there and just looking at her was too much to bear. He needed to leave the restaurant, regardless of the rain. "I don't think about things like you do" he added, "I didn't allow myself to be honest with my feelings…"

"What is that supposed to mean?" she asked, water dripping from her hair.

"I don't analyze my emotions—it never occurred to me that I liked you as more than a friend" he responded simply, he had taken to studying his emotions the past week.

"But now you've magically come to that conclusion?" she demanded, angry at him for the situation they now found themselves in. She kept rumbling on, gesticulating with her hands.

"But when I did, I realized how the feelings had been there all along. Lizzie, I can't turn back time" he whispered, grabbing her hands and looking into her eyes, "What do you want me to do?"

"I want things to be different" she cried, wiping her face with her hands, "I can't hurt David…" she muttered. Darcy took a step closer to her and took hold of her arms again.

"Stop thinking about other people—what do _you_ want?"

"I don't know!" she cried, staring into his eyes. He leaned in and kissed her passionately—ignoring the water that was pouring on them. As lighting went off in the sky, Lizzie suddenly pulled away, staring at him in disbelief.

"I'm engaged!" she said, showing him the ring, "What are you doing?"

"Trust me, I'm fully aware that you are engaged. Look, just tell me that you are not doubting for a second that I'm the one for you and I'll leave you alone. You know that we are meant to be together"

"Do I? No…I don't. I love David. I do. I think this is just the wrong timing but it was meant to happen that way. For whatever reason…" she muttered, looking up in deep thought. Out of nowhere a realization dawned on her, "I don't love you…" she whispered, her eyes widening with the discovery.

"What are you saying?" asked Will, shocked at her demeanor.

"I was infatuated with you but a relationship needs to work both ways. I choose to live my life with someone that is straightforward, in touch with his feelings and committed to making this relationship work. I might like you and heck, I might have even _thought_ I loved you, but we never had a relationship. It is possible if we did go out, I'd realize that it wouldn't work out. But I don't need to do that. I have a relationship that I know does work" she looked down and was lost in deep thought, "I've been such a fool!" she added, smiling for the first time.

"Lizzie?" asked Will, looking confused.

"I don't love you" whispered Lizzie again, with a huge smile plastered on her face. "We never had a relationship…I was imagining in my head…but all I love is the _idea_ of you. And I don't need an idea, I have the _real_ thing" she answered calmly. Will's face became phlegmatic, he didn't know what as happening nor how he should respond. "I wish you the best Will" murmured Lizzie, reaching up and kissing him lightly on the cheek.

"Is this goodbye?" asked Will, unsure of what just transpired.

"In a way, it is" she answered, smiling at him. She turned around with a huge smile plastered on her face. The clarity this conversation had brought was priceless. She had been such a fool…the person for her had been there all along…

"Lizzie?" asked a voice, making Lizzie stop.

"David?" she asked, looking up and noticing her fiancé in front of her. How long had he been there?

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><p><em><strong>Author's Note<strong>_: ahhhhh what did you think?


	11. Chapter 11

_**Author's Note: **_thank you to everyone that reviewed! This chapter is dedicated to you! I will answer all comments underneath, but for now...

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><p><strong><span>Ch 11<span>**:

Lizzie flung her hands around her betrothed's neck. But David stood there stiffly, glaring at Darcy. Lizzie took a step back and looked intently into his eyes—trying to read his expression. The rain continued to pour on them, reminding Lizzie that had been an injudicious decision.

"This is my friend Will" said Lizzie, awkwardly introducing them. They glanced at each other and an unspoken understanding was conveyed.

"I'm David" he said, extending out his hand politely. Darcy shook his hand firmly, though his head was spinning with a multitude of thoughts. Lizzie had rejected him. She said she didn't love him.

"Well, I think we should go inside Lizzie, though I see you are already soaking wet" said David, in a monotone voice. Lizzie could feel how tense he was.

"Yeah" she nodded, "Bye" she said towards Will and reached for David's hand. He allowed her to hold it—since he was a gentleman, but didn't squeeze it back. They got under the tent of the restaurant and David looked at her with watery eyes.

"So he is the one?" asked David, holding back tears. "He is the one that has holds the key to your heart?"

"No!" said Lizzie, taking a step closer to him. "He is not. David, I've been a fool!" began Lizzie, but David wasn't listening.

"No, _I've_ been the fool. I knew you hadn't fully given of yourself but I hope, nay I prayed that eventually you would. Lizzie, I love you. But I'm not competing for your heart, attention and thoughts" answered David calmly. He turned around but Lizzie pulled him around, desperately trying to get him to listen.

"I know this looks back David, but please, listen to me" she begged, her eyes conveying the truth. "_Please_" she murmured, holding on to his arms. She hugged him tightly and rested her head on his chest, taking in the smell of him. He cupped her face and looked into her eyes.

"Goodbye Lizzie" he whispered, kissing her on the cheek. He walked away and left her standing there, alone. Lizzie felt the tears precipitating from her eyes, as she saw the love of her life walk away.

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><p>It took her a few hours to calm down. In between sobs, she pulled out a pen and paper and a poem began to formulate on the page. She didn't regret running after Darcy since it led to this realization. She needed to come to terms with her emotions.<p>

_My heart is swelling up_

_With a feeling of ease,_

_I finally see,_

_That we were never meant to be._

_I've been such a fool,_

_But I've now grown wise,_

_I wasted my time,_

_But I won't be fooled twice._

_Not everything that shines,_

_Is automatically gold._

_Sometimes what's hidden,_

_Is worth even more._

_I've been such a fool,_

_And now I'm in love,_

_Not with an idea,_

_But a true human soul._

_The time was not wasted,_

_I've grown and I've learned,_

_I love you,_

_Please marry me David._

The last few words conveyed every emotion she was currently feeling. A tear fell on the page, denting the paper. She wiped off her tears and with a sudden inspiration, grabbed her purse and left the apartment. After what seemed like an eternity, she knocked on his door, not caring that she had never looked this disheveled.

"Lizzie" said David, completely surprised, "What are you here? It's so late! Did you take the subway? Please tell me that you didn't!"

"You still care about me?" whispered Lizzie, hope swelling up her heart. David gave her a smile that would make any woman melt.

"How can I stop?" he murmured, looking at her with bathetic eyes.

"I want to read you something" she said, "It's a poem I wrote for you…" She pulled the crumbled piece of paper from her bag and read it to him, with tears in her eyes. "I love you…I've been a fool. I let the idea of something confuse what was real. I know I don't deserve you" she began, gesticulating loudly with her hands, "I'm sorry. I know that doesn't cut it. But I want you to know, I _need_ you to know that we had was real. I did give of myself to you. I did let you in. I'm sorry if I hurt you—"

David kissed her passionately, cupping her face and bringing her close. Lizzie kissed him back like never before. All the emotions that she had been holding back finally lashed out and found their appropriate outlet. She caressed his neck as tears percolated their lips.

"I love you" she murmured, letting out a heavy sigh. He looked at her like never before and whispered, "I love you too". A smile spread on both of their faces, as he pulled her close and hugged her tightly.

** *The End***

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><p><strong><em>Author's Note<em>**: As I mentioned in the beginning, this is a story that is very dear to my heart. I think all women can relate with having "fallen in love" with someone to only realize that the infatuation was never real. I went into this story, like I do with all of my stories, not having the ending set. I wanted Lizzie to discover for herself what was best for her and I have to say, that I have no regret. Though Darcy was dear to her heart, I think Lizzie got the point where she realized what they had wasn't real. I hope that ending does not offend you! and that you liked it! I look forward to hearing you thoughts and will respond on PM.

_Answers to questions/comments_:

beco44: you didn't like the letter? why did you think he shouldn't have written it?

SLD: yeah it was very difficult to write because I wanted all of the emotions to be conveyed but yet for the scenerio and what was happening to be clear.

mudpie: lol sorry, I hope you don't hate me for this ending!

clarinetto: yes he did...

prevail upon me: happy? lol

3dayeventer: thanks! im glad you think so! like I said in the beginning, if you've fallen in love with david, then I've done my job.

draminofan: thank you! that compliment means a lot to me!

NYT: haha i loved your review! thank you! and I absolutely loved that line! i was thinking of maybe using it in the story but i didnt want to bring darcy back in. he is out. this is it...


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